Tuesday, September 20, 2005

Some Funny Stuff

As I had mentioned in my initial post I will attempt to keep this site diversified. While I spent over 6 hours on the Skip Gilbert letter digest it almost made me feel like a real tri-geek, in total obsession of the sport and the politics of the sport. But, alas, I have gained my senses and now want to offer some humor or just tid-bits of some things I have seen in the news, or magazines. I have a great article coming up within a few days on one of the great female triathletes in the USA, but we need a break. Here goes:

"Chief Justice nominee John G. Roberts said in his opening statement at the confirmation hearings that he has no agenda and no platform. You know what that means? He could be the next Democratic candidate for President."---Jay Leno

"Dolphins washed out of an aquarium during the hurricane were rescued from the Gulf of Mexico. Later the dolphins said, 'Thank God we've been saved from swimming freely in the ocean and put back in our tanks.' "---Conan O'Brien

Who said, "Mission accomplished", while the killing goes on. At least they are killing each other and very few of our soldiers.---(not a joke) Mike Greer

Arrested. John Bush, 21, youngest son of Florida Governor Jeb Bush; on charges of public drunkenness and resisting arrest; in Austin, Texas. The Governor called the matter "private" and said he son was doing "fine". ---The scary thing about this is that Jeb would have been president but he actually had all of the brains in the family, so he left it up to the W man to rule. Also, if John keeps it up maybe he can repent, be born again, and then be our president in 25 years.---Mike Greer

James Madison, the 4th President of the United States was also the shortest president, standing with high heels at 5' 4". They called him, yep you guess it, "shorty." The tallest President of the United States was Abraham Lincoln(honest Abe) standing tall at 6' 4", they called him, yep you guess it again, "slim." --Mike Greer

Trivia question: What two presidents of the United States were grandfather and grandson?--Mike Greer

Died. Sergeant Mark Matthews, 111, oldest of the "Buffalo Soldiers," a legendary regiment of black G.I.s who fought frontier wars with Native Americans(they nicknamed the soldiers, whose curly black hair reminded them of the buffalo's mane), laid hundreds of miles of roads and telegraph lines and won 20 medals of Honor; in Washington. One of the World War II veteran's early missions was tracing Mexican bandit Pancho Villa along the Mexican border. "I never met him," Matthews said, "but I knew where he was at."--Time Magazine

"Just when I discovered the meaning of life, they changed it."--George Carlin

"I think it would be great if you could make a guy's head explode just by staring at him."--George Carlin

"Most people don't know what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it."--George Carlin

Definition of triathlon from an intellectual viewpoint: "Triathlon is the evolution of synergistic motion."--Mike Greer

"The problem with aging is that you grow older."--Mike Greer

"I have never made love to a 10, but one night I had five 2's."--(edited) George Carlin

"In today's world I am really concerned about the influence of religion on spirituality, it is so detrimental to it."--Mike Greer

Good day!!


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