Movie Review-Good, Bad and Ugly

Movie Reviews:  Due to a backlog of movies seen but not reviewed I decided to separate them out from the normal blog format.  There are a couple of good ones, but only one four star.  The rest are three star or below:

“21 Jump Street”  *, Terrible movie about two recent graduates from a police academy who are sent to a high school as under cover drug detectives.  Sounds serious but turned out totally stupid and poorly done.  Johnny Depp made a cameo that didn’t make sense either.  Rated R for crude and sexual content, pervasive language, drug material, teen drinking and some violence. 

“The Hunger Games”, ****, The Hunger Games is about a futuristic reality program played out in the ruins of once North America.  The nation of Panem forces its 12 districts to choose a boy and girl to complete,  Part twisted entertainment, part government intimidation tactic, the Hunger Games are televised events in which the 24 representatives or Tributes must stalk and kill one another until there is only one surviver.  Jennifer Lawrence does a great job as one of the 24 Tributes and Josh Hutcherson does the same as her counter part.  Of course there is some boy girl action that lead to affection and love, but to the good for the ending.  Rated PG-13 for intense violent thematic material and distrubing images, all involving teens. 

“The Lucky One”, ***,  The film opens with Marin Sgt. Logan Thibault(played by Zach Efrom) returning from his third tour of duty in Iraq.  In his last combat fight in Iraq he found a photo of a woman who he felt helped save his life.  After being discharged he was determined to find her so that he could thank her.  Once he found her the other drama’s of life begin, including romance, etc.  A good movie.  Rated PG-13 for some sexuality and violence.  

“Marvel’s The Avengers”, ***, When evil is trying to take over the world the need for super heroes is required.  So, “Iron Man”, “The Incredible Hulk”, “Thor”, and “Captain America” are assembled to fight the evil villians.  While the results is predictable the journey with these super heroes is interesting.  With Downey Jr. playing Iron Man again he seemed to dominate, but they all held their own.  Results is easy to guess but was fun to watch.  Rated PG-13 for intense sequences of sci-fi violence and action throughout, and a mild drug reference.  

“Wrath of the Titans”, ***, The story takes place a decade after Perseus, demigod son of Zeus, defeated the Kraken in “Clash of the Titans.”  Probably would have been better if I had seen the orginal, but generally don’t have much interest in these kind of movies.  (Where have all the good westerns gone??) But, it was well done, with lots of action with swords, knives, etc.  Sam Worthington, Llam Neeson and Ralph Flennes are very believable in their parts.  Rated PG-13 for intense sequences of fantasy violence and action. Not a prime timer but worth matinee prices.

Heroes to Mud Slingers

As I mentioned a few blogs ago I like to learn something new everyday, no matter the importance or impact of this new knowledge.  Well the past week was spent observing some new things, again, and learning so that is the reason for no posting on fasttwitchmind.  Yea I know a punny excuse and an indication of laziness; however, I just didn’t seem to have the time to sit down and write.  Last week was spent at the Warrior Games, and Spartan Races in Colorado Springs, CO.  The Warrior Games is a series of athletic events that feature armed forces athletes with various serious injuries, mostly in combat zones.  There are literally thousands of soldiers that have survived the Iraq and Afhgan atrocities, called special hand made bombs that are designed to rip off arms and legs but leave the person alive.  So, I was able to watch these galiant men and women compete against all odds and what an inspiration it was.  I had never seen a person swim with no legs up to the hip, and only one arm.  On the basketball team(played in wheelchairs) one athlete was missing a leg, an arm, an eye, but was the best shooter on the team.  So, needless to say my three days watching these patriots compete was an eye opener for me.  I learned more about humility and appreciation for my excellent health and the fact I spent over 24 years in the US Army and missed all of the wars.  Sometimes I wonder about that and ask was I really lucky or am I missing some vast knowledge that I would have acquired in combat?  

Then the other part of the week in the Springs was spent observing the other play thing now going on big time called “mud obstacle” racing.  This again was done to learn more of the sport and see what I can do to offer these gang busters a truly professional association to serve them.  I entered the event, like 4500 other mudd loving souls, with the idea of watching and observing up close as possible.  But unlike my Tough Mudder mind melt down, when I decided to do that event and suffer for two weeks afterwards, I actually did just walk around observing.  What I learned is that people do like to crawl in the mud, jump over 8’ fences, climb 30’ ropes and then conclude the race by running through a 3’ fire pit.  Ooooops I forgot to mention that they pay $100.00 to do this!  So, now we have this relative young athletic sporting event that gives everyone the venue to vent in all kinds of ways.  And to think I thought football was barbaric!  This sport makes football players look like silly sissies from the debate class!!  Looks like it is here to stay with new events and production companies sprouting up like weeds on freshly watered and fertized burmuda grass!!  So, I take this new knowledge and see what I can do with it!  Stayed tuned on www.obstacleusa.com.

EA, SH.......:)!

greerman

Movie Reviews coming on separate post!

Original Oreo!!

Some things in life are sacred and do not need to be messed with. A good example is the simple, tasty, delicious, scrumptious, to die for Oreo cookie. The other day I was in a hurry and I was doing a quick run through the grocery store to gather up a few items. On the list was my beloved Oreo cookie and as I approached the cookie department I found that seemingly over night there were many choices of this great treat. I guess I have been asleep at the switch and the Oreo guys just got drunk one night and decided to add a bunch of flavors, 16 to be exact. As I search for the original I found that they were hidden in the middle of all these flavors and it was hard to distinguish which were the originals. As I looked I found the new flavors, i.e. golden, double packed, springtime, chocolate fudge, organic, mint creme, peanut butter, peppermint, fudge, and reduced fat( now they are really messing with perfection, I want the fat calories, sweet taste, and cavity creating originals, it is traditional!!). My love for Oreo’s centers around the fact that you can really eat them 3 or 4 different ways and get sensations from each serving. You can just eat them head on bite for bite into the all three portions of the cookie, i.e. two chocolate wafers with cream in the middle, or you can separate them and make it seem like three different pieces. The other approach is to dunk them in cold milk. My usual quota after a good meal is to eat 3 cookies for dessert and if I still have a sweet tooth that needs satisfying I will go with 2 more and that’s it. I have a friend that opens up a new, full bag and eats the whole bag without stopping. It is amazing since he is trim and slim while eating the original Oreo with such vengence you would think he is a vampire enjoying his daily blood requirement. My plea to Nabisco, “place the orginal Oreo in a prominant place all by itself with a big star around it!!” Just like a sports team that features its’ star player!!

EA, SH.......:)

greerman

Tough Mudder!!

Some time back in my life I made the resolution that I would learn something new everyday for the rest of my life, no matter how big or small it was or is. So, at the end of the day I take inventory of what I have learned new for that day and I always come up with something. For example, I know that if I carry the groceries up the stairs with too much in a plastic bag the handle will fail and I will drop those groceries. Or, as I have aged I find that if I come into contact with a solid object to my body it will bruise and stay sore longer than when I was younger. Since I played football for 14 years of my life I learned that the oblong ball took many weird bounces and the players who played the game like to hit and get hit using every muscle and speed available to carry out their assignments. I also learned that the athletic mentality of football was a lasting thing, almost like a tattoo but even more so in that it was imbeaded in the sub conscious mind where as the tattoo is just under the skin and can be removed. So, while trying to keep to my creed of learning something new every day most intelligent people would ask, so what if learning about the pain of football is such a big deal or what does it have to do with life. Well, to answer that I would quote one of my early football coaches who said, “everything you learn on the football field will be of value to you for the rest of your life and you will never forget it. The reason being is you learn about pain, fatigue, adversity, teamwork, hard work, dedication, will to win, victory, losing and on and on!” You know, he was right and I think of that guy almost every day of my life.

Now today as I sit here at my desk with a bruised swollen big toe, bruised left hip, bruised swollen left thumb, sore stomache muscles, sore pecks, and a real feeling of fatigue, mud still caked in my finger nails, toe nails and ears I have that really good feeling of “finishing!” As I visit the things my coach had promised would happen if I played football I find all of the things he mentioned, good and bad, even though he didn’t realize I would be competing in some mud race 50 years after his revelations. As I mentioned above that football mentality just seems to stay within the sub-conscious mind no matter what or the age of the ex player. Since I entered this thing called Tough Mudder with the idea of going and “observing” I found the adrenaline and buckets of testosterone flowing freely was just too much to pass up. So, I decided to start the 12 mile journey through mud, ice water, obstacles that challenge the strongest and bravest and stop when I saw fit. Well after going through the first 3 miles I was really disgusted with myself in that this thing was real hard and while I was fit to run the 12 miles with ease I wasn’t fit to climb, lift, pull, crawl, or submerge myself in mud that often was knee deep. As a kid I really never liked to play in the mud but it appeared other entrants there did do that as kids. Of course the average age on the course was some where around 29 or younger and I saw no “white hairs” to speak of, I felt senior lonesome. One of the things I did notice is that everyone did care about the other athletes and they offered to help me more that I really wanted, but I did appreciate it(my thought did wonder if they sensed my age and felt sorry for me until I saw a guy who knew me and said, “your our hero, keep on going”, honestly that was good for my ego to complete another 3 miles). Since this was considered a team event and I was a team of one there was assistance offered on the obstacles that required more than one to get through them.

In the conclusion I spent over 4 hours on the course, completed the full 12 miles and was designated a “Tough Mudder” finisher and have the certificate to prove it. While I have no desire to do this again I will admit I have been thinking of who my team members would be “IF” I decided to tackle this event again. Ummmm!!!, Mark Garland, Mark Livesy, and grand son Cameron Richardson, sounds like a winning team to me!! I wonder??? Hey you Tough Mudders hit the deck with push ups, sit ups, leg lifts, etc., etc., we got a mission to accomplish!!

EA, SH........:)

greerman

Snort, Spit and Blow, Movie Reviews

Running has for sure become a social thing more than a running thing. Not that this is all bad since it does get people off the couch and out the door. This past weekend I took some big time mental notes of what was going on prior, during and after the 15,000 person Rock N Roll half marathon in Big D Texas. Since I was there for the running portion of running, I like to get to the start line early for warm up and stretching so I took particular note of this “new era” runner. First, they really like to socialize before the event and spend a lot of time comparing notes on the latest running outfits, pre-race eating and drinking, and just useless gab that has nothing to do with why we are there. Again, not a bad thing just a different thing for us old timers who help start this boom back in the stone ages. We use to get to the start line warmed up, juiced up and ready to run as fast at the body would allow. No discussion, just run like hell and get out of my way. Now the events have a lot of walkers in them and I think that is a good thing since it pads the number of entry fees and helps pay for the event, plus “they” are doing something instead of nothing. Also, I notice the female population has really increased their running participation and that is a real good thing, especially if they are good looking. Sorry, but my selfishness for taking my mind off the running pain centers around looking at good looking women as they run. When it comes to this I do not mind the fashion, running bra and all!! Ooops back to the subject at hand!

The actual running of the event gives the more experienced runners(in other words the old timers) a chance to get with it and see how fast the motor is for the day. Some of my running friends from the past use to tell me that running with me was like running with a horse, since I snort a lot, spit a lot and blow my nose as I run. The spitting came from many years on the football turf, since footballers spit a lot, and we had real grass and dirt to spit on. I try to avoid hitting some other runners with it but with 15,000 how do you have enough space? The snorting is no problem, just goes with the sound of running. Then there is the nose blowing, something that just comes naturally for me when I run. I use the “put my thumb” on the opposite nostril that I am blowing from(a man thing, since I never see a women blow their nose that way) method and it causes a projectile of snot that can annoy others I am sure. But, this is a runners perogitive and I do my best not to hit someone else, but again with a sea of runners how do you have enough space. During this last race I know I hit a few people with it but they didn’t seem to care. If a runner looks like they are in my age group I try to hit right before they take a step so they might slip a little and give me an edge in placing higher in the age group. The problem with that is that my age group is that “old” group I mentioned and they are very clever about avoiding any kind of contact. With the spitting there is a little more control and not near as many people get hit by my spit bombs. Warning, don’t bug me when I am running!

While the race has all forms of activities going on in it the newer races now have live bands and lots of activities going on during the race. Again a very social atmosphere! While this is fine and dandy it also takes away from why we are really there. I am not there to hear the latest hot tune or to even sing along with the music or to talk about the latest fashions, I am there, by God, to run, snort, spit, blow my nose, sweat, hurt, de-hydrate, ache, cramp, and generally feel very bad at the end. This is simply because that is what this thing called “running and racing” is all about. It is called a “good feel, bad feeling!” A way of life or possibly a life style! Who cares just get out of my way, my left hand is moving to my left nostril, beware!!

EA(u ole runner u!), SH,..........:),

greerman

Movie Reviews: “Descendents” *****, This was an Academy Award winner and very deserving. George Clooney stars and does an excellent job. The story revolves around the tragic accident involving his wife who is rendered comatose after the accident and the struggles the surviving husband(Clooney) experiences with the two daughters and other dramas brought to light. Rated PG-13, family drama, language, somewhat depressing.

“The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo” ****, This movie stars new actress Rooney Mara, and the James Bond guy, Daniel Craig. Excellent movie with lots of international intrigue and myster. Rated R-sexual scenes(soft porn), language, violence.

“Wanderlust”, ***, This is a very funny movie with lots of humor but a good story line. It stars Paul Rudd and Jennifer Aniston as an over extended, stressed out Manhattan couple who leave the city trying to find the a way to make a living. They stumble upon a group of people, formerly called “hippies” in the 60’s, and find a new way of life. One of the scenes with Rudd is a rib cracker with humor. Rated R for sexual content, graphic nudity, language and drug use.

“Casa de Mi Padre” Zero rating, Will Ferrell has probably made more bad movies than any good actor I know. This has got to be the all time worst and I wonder, “how did I sit through this bag of garbage?” There was only one other person in the movie house watching it. The movie is in spainish with the narrative at the bottom of the screen spelled out. It is 100% spainish cast except Ferrell who is supposed to be spainish with blue eyes. It is so stupid it really makes me feel even more stupid for watching it. The drama is about his family about to lose their large ranch, then it goes bad from there. Rated R for bloody violence, language, some sexual content and drug use. If you go see it after this review God rest your soul!

The Conductor, Movie Reviews

How can something the size of a walnut have so much power over a healthy life style and have the gall to interfere with a good nights sleep or an active sex life. Well let me tell you folks out there that little dude has received a special name and designation from me and I am proud to share it. The prostate gland sits in such a cozy little place in the human body that it has tremendous influence on what goes on around the sexual activity and passing of the urine that I have re-named it “The Conductor.” The conductor on the passenger trains used to be the person who made everything happen for its’ passengers and even gave the green light for the train to start moving. He was always a “he”, but had on those snappy little black suits, white shirt and a black bow tie. Now I am not proposing that the little walnut that sits down there all decked out in black, but you know it wouldn’t surprise me if it is.

The conductor of the male body sits at such a strategic point that it has a strangle hold on the uretha and can affect the bladder in very negative ways. Since the uretha itself has some fairly large duties and prides itself in being able to pass semen and urine to the respective outlets it becomes very irritated when ole bully walnut squeezes it off and won’t let it function properly. It has been nick named the “Double Teamer,” by those in the know. So, then the captain of the ship(human male body person) gets really irritated when the sex life and passing of urine does not happen as it should. Also, not to mention having to pass urine in the worst possible time or the opposite of not being able to pass urine at the most opportune time.

Since all males over the age of about 60(give or take a few years per individual) start to experience the possible difficulties of the conductor, my purpose here is to shout out and let you know that this is all very normal. The walnut gland is the only gland that continues to grow in the body, so the longer we live the larger it gets. Now to take control of the Mr. Fatty conductor there are options starting with drugs that shrink it(with side affects most of us do not want, i.e. it affects our sex life, so then we have to take other drugs to offset that) or the ole roto rooter method of shaving the excess fat off with a metal shaving device, which causes some side affects, long recovery, and lots of bleeding. Now comes along the modern day treatment of reducing the walnut with a laser treatment that is a one hour procedure, recovery is much quicker, blood loss much less, and should be good for 7 years. With acronym names such as, TURP, Green Light, and HoLap, how can we wrong!

Now as the “Conductor” says, “all aboard Mr. Laserman, take charge and go after that dude that has gone from walnut size to small apple size!” Note: Is that where the term, “not comparing apples to apples came from?”

Movie Reviews:

“Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance”, **, While I like Nicolas Cage this part and this character is just so stupid. He has sold his soul to the devil(kind of like our politicians) so every time he wants to fight evil he turns into burning fire while riding his motorcycle. So, he rides around getting the bad guys while blowing out fire from his mouth. At the end of the day he is tired of this mission in life and wants out of the deal. You must go see it to find out if he does, either way there will be a sequel. Rated PG-13 for intense sequences of action and violence, some disturbing images, and language.

“My Week With Marilyn”, ****, An excellent movie about Marilyn Monroe and the week that Colin Clark entered into the film business, as a young 23 year old. This is based on a true story of the week that Clark spent with Marilyn after her husband Marvin Miller left for out of town business. He was her go to person for everything that made her life more complete in between movie scenes. After all she invented the word, “Diva!” Rated R for some language.

“This Means War”, ***, A clever movie but nothing more than three stars. Two CIA agents get put on leave because of their last disasterous assignment and in their boredom they just happen to go after the same good looking young blonde lady, played by Reese Witherspoon. They(Chris Pine, Tom Hardy) use all of their professional gimmicks to win over the girl. Go see to see who wins the contest! Rated PG-13 for sexual content including references, some violence and actions, and for language.

“Chronicle”, **, A low budget movie about mid-western youth who have super natural powers. Unknown actors and a weird movie. Not worth a premium ticket. I was there because it was the only movie starting at the time I arrived and I get senior rates. Rated PG-13 for intense action and violence, thematic material, some language, sexual content and teen drinking.

“The Vow”, ***, A good love story based on a married woman who loses all her memory after a terrible auto wreck. When she awakens she doesn’t remember being married or her husband. So, the film centers around him trying to revive her memory. Rachel McAdams plays the young wife and Channing Tatum plays her husband. If you like love stories with lots of drama this is a good one. Rated PG-13 for a car accident scene, sexual content, partial nudity and some language.

EA, SH.......:),

greerman

Freedom, Movie Reviews

What does 2.5 “ x 4.5” have to do with the feel of freedom? First, get your dirty mind out of the gutter and quit thinking it has to do with the “size doesn’t matter theme!” This freedom has to do with a little object most people on this planet have, adore, respect, need, and want. Fact is when it is out of their site they wonder where it is, where they left it, did some one steal it or did it drop down the commode on the last flushing. It may be black, blue or some off beat color dreamed up by the magic of artistic design. Now that you get it and I have your attention I am talking about that little monster called the “cell phone!” On Friday I took mine in for a face lift since I had dropped it numerous times and the face had shattered like a windshield up against a steel wall at 200 miles per hour. It was really a mess, but actually still worked. So, I had put off having it repaired simply because I felt I couldn’t live without it and didn’t want to part with the smallest friend I have. But, I took it in and left it with them with a promise they would have it ready within 3 hours. Now I wondered what was I going to do for these three hours, how was I going to talk, text, and e-mail for 180 minutes of the day when there is only 1,440 minutes in a 24 hour period.

The first thing I did when I got in the car was start looking for my cell wondering what had happened to it. Had I left it at home, had it dropped in between the seats, or had it been stolen. Oooops self, you just left it in for repairs. Then I decided I would go to the pool and get a swim work out in and I sure didn’t need it while swimming laps. Normally before I get in the water I check my cell for all the important commo’s that were coming my way, then the minute I get out of the pool I do the same. But wait I didn’t have my cell with me so I could swim extra laps to reduce the anxiety of not having that nagging, possesive instrument with me and if I missed a call like so what! After completing the swim work out I got out of the pool, took a shower, dressed and headed to my car so I could check my calls. God forbid it wasn’t there, must be inbetween the seats, no I left it in the pool, no it is in my swim bag, nope you dumb butt it is in for repair I finally realized.

So, I checked my watch and the 3 hours will be up in 20 minutes so I can drive around town till it is ready or I could go by a little early and see if it might be ready. After all it has been nearly 3 hours and I must have tons of calls, texts, e-mails, smoke signals, etc.!! When I enter the shop I am not the only person there and I noticed everyone had some kind of anxiety look on their face. O my God they must have been without their cells for the past 3 hours at least or maybe longer. What is this world coming to? When I ask for my phone they seemed to have trouble finding it, but then this little geeky looking nerd comes out from behind closed doors holding my cell in his sweaty hands with this grin that says, “I got your cell but your not going to get it until you pay me!!” Okay, no problem what is the cost since it doesn’t matter I have to have it now and I have hated this 3 hours of freedom more than you can imagine. As I walk out the door I immediately turn it on and lo and behold, NO messages of any kind on it!! I am not near as important as I think I am and all this anxiety for nothing. Now is the time to throw it in the commode!

Movie Reviews:

“One For The Money”, *, A really bad movie even if it is a Stephanie Plum novel story. Even an excellent actress, Katherine Heigl, can’t pull this bad movie out of the gutter. With that said even the excellent popcorn didn’t do a thing for it. Go at your own risk if you ignore my warning. Rated PG-13 for violence, sexual references and language, some drug material and partial nudity.(None of that helps the cause, it is a very bad movie, I want a refund!)

“Man On A Ledge”, ***, This is an excellent three star movie, lots of action, good story, and excellent acting. Sam Worthington stars as an ex-cop and now-wanted fugitive who risks his life on the ledge of a high-rise bilding while a tough New York City Police Department hostage negotiator(played by Elizabeth Banks) tries to talk him down. The longer they are on the ledge, the more she begins to realize that Worthington just might have an ulterior objective. Go see for yourself if that is the case!! Rated PG-13 for violence and brief strong language.

“The Grey”, ****, This is an exellent movie and star Liam Nelson delivers a terrific performance as a once-suicidal character unwilling to give up. A word to the wise, stay through the final credits. The story revolves around a group of oil rig roughnecks and the sniper(Liam Nelson) hired to protect them from wild wolves in the wilds of frigid Alaska. While being flown to their next oil rig their plane crashes and there are some survivors. So, the story now begins and will keep you on the edge of your seat, I promise! Rated R for violence/disturbing content including bloody images and for pervasive language.

“Safe House”, ****, Oscar winner Denzel Washington plays a CIA renegade, Tobin Frost, a dangerous spy who comes back on the grid after a decade on the run. Young rookie CIA agent Matt Weston(played by Ryan Reynolds) is his host in the “safe house.” Lots of action, lots of sub plots, lots of bad guys and gals. Lots of action, a must see for anyone who likes good stories, and action. Rated R for strong violence throughout and some language.

EA, SH......:),

greerman