Saturday, December 27, 2008

Going South, Movie Reviews

During December there were three topics for conversation that seemed to slap me in the face ever time I was around 1 or more humans(Buffman & Squeaky don't really care, they are just good dogs that watch over their triathlon, poop, pie, eat, bark, and sleep a lot) three topics of conversation always came up: 1. My birthday on December 16th proclaiming me officially 70 at 6:38 a.m., 2. The election of President Elect Obama, 3. The economy going South. Well the birthday thing has come and gone, the election has come and gone as we watch the New administration take shape, but everything in the economy is going South. As I watch this happen it makes me a aware of other things that are going South around me. It seems as though every time I eat something it goes South directly to my ever growing love handles. Now I guess I should be happy since love handles are there for a purpose, not that I really understand what they are far except to aggravate me and protrude over my pants and look stupid in the mirror. When I weighed 149 lbs. playing football in High School, I had love handles, when I played college football weighing 180 lbs. I had love handles, but they didn't seem to be heading South. They are supposed to be some kind of muscle and look good on some people but I have never grown to love them at all. It appears that the Oreo's that I eat have a direct path to my love handles and seem to get there with 100 mph speed. Then I look in the mirror when I get up in the morning and right around my chin there seems to be some natural reconstruction work going on with my lower jaw and chin going South. What the hell is going on here? It is one thing for the economy to go South, but leave my body alone and let's keep that level bubble in the right position. Today while I was riding my bike trainer I looked down and the lower part of my gut looked like it was heading South. So, what I have planned for January 1 is to declare WWIII on my love handles and take charge of those little pests. I will cut my Oreo's down, along with my beer(which now is only a 6 pack a week at the most), increase my exercise and do more work on shaving those two dudes off. I keep thinking that along with the e-mail solicitations that come in to enlarge my penis there will be something on getting rid of disgusting love handles. Surely the same technology would work, even though I really don't know if the penis enlargement works or not since I haven't tried it. Thank God the penis hasn't headed South permanently so I will leave that be, for the time being. But, all these smart folks that shave off fat from fat people, enlarge breasts, remove wrinkles, and make you look like a China man with the eye jobs could take care of my every loving love handles. Of course I also realize that they got that name for a reason, supposedly your love partner will grab hold of those things during wild times of passion and hold on for dear life. Makes sense to me, so why am I complaining, I got a good thing going so now I should love those dudes and make the most of it. Off to exercise !!

Movie Review: "Bedtime Stories", *(For adults), ***(For 6 year olds), Adam Standler plays the lead is this totally kid movie. While I can't say it was a bad movie since it was geared from kids, I did just say that when it was finally over. Rated: PG for some mild rude humor and mild language(this was a Disney movie, so maybe they did say "gosh darn" a few times.

" The Curious Case of Benjamin Button", ****, Brad Pitt, Cate Blanchett, Taraji Henson and Tilda Swinton play in this very unusual movie about a man who is in his 80's when he is born and ages backwards. It is a very well done movie and interesting to watch. Pitt and Blanchett are excellent in this movie. The movie opens in 1918, at the end of WW I, and progresses into the 21st Century. A very good love story, a must see. Rated PG-13 for brief war violence, sexual content, language and smoking.

"Doubt", ***, Set in 1964 at the Catholic school St. Niclolas in the Bronx, the story finds a nun and school principle, played by Meryl Streep, growing suspicious when Father Flynn, played by Philip Seymour Hoffman, begins taking interest in the life of the school's first black student. Without any proof other than her moral certainty, the Sister locks into a battle of wills with Father Flynn. It is a well done movie, possible boring to some, with great acting. Not enough for the fourth star but could get some nominations. Rated PG-13 for thematic material.



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