Monday, January 30, 2012

Ole Barn!, Movie Review

Barney Fife use to be a household word when the Andy Griffith show centered in Mayberry USA, was a popular TV show. The part was played by bug eyed, naturally nervous Don Knotts and he played it well. His part was that of the Deputy Dog to the Sheriff, Andy Griffith, and he was best known for jumping to conclusions, carrying 2 bullets in his right breast pocket, and making a minor offense become a major felony. Now that I live in a Mayberry type community(population 1096) I had the experience of meeting our Mr. Barney the other night. A few years ago I heard that there had not be a traffic violation citation issued in Ransom Canyon in over 25 years, so things seemed to be very low key for the past 11 years we have lived in the Canyons. Then wouldn’t you know it, I was coming home at around 7:30 p.m. and drove in at the back side entrance minding my own business, while whistling “Hail to the Chief!” Noticing there was no traffic of any kind, so I reduced my speed and started the descent and all of sudden swirling lights came on, sirens started blaring, and the two breast pocket bullets were being loading. This patrol car came roaring out of its’ hidden position and I was being chased by the only police car within 15 miles. Yes folks, I was going 48 MPH in a 35 MPH speed zone and now local BF was after me. While I admit that I didn’t give him any resistence and pulled over very obediently, pulling out my license and insurance cards waiting for him to approach my drivers side. While it seemed like fowever for him to approach me since he was moving in a very stealth movement, I wondered if I was going to receive the two bullets in a way I wasn’t deserving of or expected them. This guy was dead serious and I knew I had a ticket for sure and no forgiveness with a warning ticket. Kind of reminded me of the movie J. Edgar Hoover.

After he took my creditials back to his car(with swirling emergency lights going at full speed) I waited again. Finally he comes back with my ticket and then asks, “can I get your phone number?” I said yes and gave it to him. Then he ask me a question that I have never been ask while receiving a traffic violation(been driving and getting tickets since I was 12, so 61 years), he ask if I would give him my social security number! I immediately said no I would not and he just kind of wilted, like a flower that had been in a vase way too long. At that point he ask me to sign the ticket(you know where it says you are not admitting to guilt, but you really are!) and I did sign it with haste and looked forward to making some space between me and the new Barney of the canyons. During my experience I noticed he had a bullet proof vest, full string of bullets in his belt not counting the two in his breast pocket, billy club, badge, and membership in the local health club. He also said, “have a nice day and it was now 7:45 p.m. and again no traffic of any kind.” I suggested that he now go to E. Lakeshore Dr. where my home is located and he could be busy all night enforcing the speed limit law. He declined my suggestion and moved back into the recessed area of the ditch, waiting for his next law breaker. Okay Barn(as Andy use to say), that is enough for tonight, go drink a soda!!

Movie Review:

“Contraband”, ***, This is a movie custom made for actor Mark Wahlberg, since he is at home with crime thrillers. Set in New Orleans, the film explores an underground world of international smuggling, filled with desperate men, corrupt officials and big payoffs--where loyalty is a rare prize and death is one bad decision away. Chis(played by Wahlberg) abandoned smuggling and went straight for his family but is forced to do one more job to help a useless brother-in-law who dumped his contraband. A predictable ending but still worth seeing. Would go at matinee pricing if possible. Rated R for violence, pervasive language and brief drug use.

EA(not for U), SH......:),



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